His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
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