I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Randomize
