There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
