Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
