You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
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