Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
home. puking in laundry basket.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize