The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize