she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
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