I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize