does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Randomize
