Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
