Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
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