I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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