Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
Randomize
