Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
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