I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
