I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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