Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
