You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
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