YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
Randomize
