During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize