I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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