; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
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