Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
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