i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
Randomize
