i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
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