He is such a slut. More and more my type.
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
i love accidental penises.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Randomize
