they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
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