He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Do you have feelings for this penis?
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Randomize
