Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
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