I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Randomize
