Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
