We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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