Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
