where am i from again
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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