that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Randomize
