HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
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