Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Randomize
