normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
