i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
I can feel your judgement through the phone
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize