Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize
