I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
Randomize
