Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
