So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
