i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Randomize
