Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Randomize
