Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
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