I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
Randomize
