As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
