i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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