i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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