Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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