This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize
